A NOTE FROM THE SWC

It’s been three months since Manya’s left us. Considering the situation laid out for us in his last letter, we thought we were never going to see him again. Would’ve been a pity, and we even had a gravestone set up and everything when Postie Pete suddenly appeared, handing us his next letter. After looking at the gravestone and the name on the letter, he questioned us about his overall speed, who which we deciphered as simply a misunderstanding. Manya’s alive and well … at least, he was. After reading this letter, we’re unsure of whether or not we’ll get another.

But this is Manya. He’s done crazier things before. We’re pretty sure he’ll get out of the situation just fine.

Oh, and as a final note, we have received the dragon-armored dragon. It appeared to have thought that it should crash head-on into our light glass symbol to find us rather then look down, and Gia towed its unconscious body inside. It’s recovering now, so if you have any questions for it, PM us and we’ll get you a response as soon as possible.

Thanks for reading.

– Alex 43

DAY 45

Still no word from the surface … or sign of it. I thought being stuck in an underground tar cave wasn’t going to be very bad, but after being lost for weeks without food or drink, things are getting fairly desperate. I think I’ve grown incredibly adapt to the darkness, and no longer even need a source of light to see.

At least I have a companion down here. Even still, though, it does get rather boring. To pass the time, we tell each other stories. … well, I do, anyways. He only knows two stories, and the only was to stop him from repeating them over and over and over … and over again is to tell some of mine. At least he’s gotten really interested in the surface, and is helping me find a way out of here.

Out of food. Been out of food for weeks. Goodness knows how long I can last without. How long WE can last without …

DAY 51

Things are getting desperate between the both of us. Starvation is inevitable, and so is death. As a last resort, we have both been secretly eying each other as food for the other, him more then me. I guess the only things keeping each other alive is the fear of what would happen to ourselves if we actually DID. Thank goodness I’m no longer human or I would’ve been eaten a long time ago.

We had found a dead rat covered in tar, and divided it amongst ourselves. The taste was horrid, but at least it was somewhat edible.

DAY 55

We’re totally desperate now. We’re banging on walls, hitting rocks on rocks, throwing tantrums and screaming for help. I’ve eaten most of my journal, so I don’t have as many entries as I should down here. Heck, my backpack’s been devoured with all my tools and such. All I’ve got left are my clothes and journal, but I know for sure that if we don’t find a way out soon, that is liable to change.

Leather backpacks actually do taste pretty good if you add just a hint of tar and fry it with dragon-breath.

DAY 58

A break-through! A wall crumbled down, and there was a blast of fresh air into the cavern. Air so wonderfully fresh that it stung our nostrils and made our eyes bleed. But we know, for where there was air, there was escape, and we made a wild sprint. We’re not there yet, and we just stopped to catch our well-earned breath and jot down a few notes.

Haven’t seen any light yet, nor do I recognize this cavern, nor did we encounter anything remotely edible. But we haven’t given up yet.

DAY 59

FREEDOM! I finally recognized the cave as the underground pass, and I led my companion out into Isafdar. The cavern behind me collapsed, blocking off our prison, but who cares? Finally, a familiar environment, brimming with trees, sunlight, and (oh happiness) all-you-can-eat rabbit! Using some rather interesting concepts of ‘teamwork’, we hunted swarms of rabbits and filled our stomachs until we couldn’t eat anything more. Dragonfired rabbit never tasted so good in my life.

Determined to meet the SWC, after hearing all my stories about you guys, my companion bid me farewell and flew east, towards you guys. Expect some company, and be prepared to cook a lot of food!

So far, my progress in learning random, previously unknown things had been limited from past events. So far, this is what I came up with:

– One’s breath smells really bad when they haven’t brushed for a month.
– One’s breath smells really really bad when they haven’t brushed in several thousand years.
– One’s breath smells really really REALLY bad when both conditions above are true whilst inside an air-locked cave.
– Ones sense of smell can actually become numbed if one smashes it against a wall enough.
I will stop by Lletya and purchase some new supplies. My companion barfed all over me after eating too many rabbits, and I’m looking to sell it as a full set of dragon armor, including plate, leggings, gauntlets, and full-faced helmet. Looks a tad awkward, though, but I know SOMEBODY will want it.

Now if only I can figure out how to get it off of me …

DAY 63

I sold the naturally-made suit of armor to some guy in a purple party hat named Soutend or something for a few million gold coins in Lletya, which I used to buy some brand new supplies, including a new backpack, provisions, and journal. The first thing I got, though, was a new wallet to actually hold all that money and carry it over to the bank. I’m putting the majority of it in the SWC funds, because I can’t use it in my travels, as it will weigh me down.

Cake and rabbit for dinner, and after tonight’s stay, I’ll head off. Maybe I’ll travel west through the uncharted forests. Can’t be any worse then the tar caves.

DAY 63

Apparently I was mistaken. At least there were no thorns, bugs, or forest wolves in the caves. I bought food, supplies, tools, and even souvenirs, but not a single weapon or shard of armor save for my robes. I think I’ve lost a few of my extra limbs through my travels, but they’ll grow back in a week’s time.

I finally found a small clearing in this intense forest, so I made camp and had salted rabbit for dinner. I swear, the things you can do with meat and salt …

I had better keep moving. Something’s coming. No sleep for me tonight, as it would be too risky. But still, the only thing worse then a dangerous spiky thorny forest is a dangerous spiky thorny forest in the dark.

DAY 67

Haven’t slept for days. I blame the wolves. What manner of animal waits until the moon is up and everyone’s asleep before they start making loud noises and parties? I swear, they are just like humans, but even humans have to sleep sometime in their lives. Rabbit for dinner again. At least food isn’t very scarce here, although I’m beginning to see less of them. Maybe it’s because I’m hunting them all, or the wolves are …. shouldn’t be afraid of them, then, because they’re already full.

Hopefully I won’t get tired of rabbit, because if I do, I might starve again. I bought plenty of spices to experiment with, so I should be fine for a few weeks.

Forest is getting much denser. I would imagine very few elves could make it through. That means I’m heading into unexplored region. I’m getting very excited. Who knows what I’ll find!

DAY 69

I was expecting some ruins or a new type of species of wolf or something. Instead, what I come across three footsteps too late is a crater nearly a mile wide and almost just as deep. There’s even a little crater with a pool of lava in the middle. It’s rather neat. I thought I would never stop tumbling and rolling down the bowl-shaped walls, and I definitely didn’t think I would just miss the lava pool by inches. Unfortunately, my backpack fell apart and all my stuff was lost to either landslides or the lava, save for a few small things like some tools and a few bundles of wrapped food.

I broke my legs. All of them. Either that or sprained them, I can’t tell which, so now I’m immobilized. I spent the rest of today searching for my stuff and gathering it up until I had a neat little pile. Then I went as close to the lava pool as I dared and used it to roast some more rabbit. I cursed the fact that I also lost all my spices, and had to eat the rabbit plain. Meh, things are more tastier when they’re more needed.

Here’s a list of my new discoveries during my exploration through the forest:

– I don’t care what travel-guides say, it’s easier to sleep WITH the wolves rather then during the night.
– When one doesn’t have a machete to clear away dense foliage, teeth can be an effective, though uncomfortable substitute
– Rabbits literally spawn themselves amoebically. Really.
– Poison ivy doesn’t make good toilet paper.

I don’t know how long I’ll be stuck down here. Even if my legs healed, how would I ever get out of here? The ground material is too charred, sandy, and runny to climb, and any failed attempt would have a chance of me falling into the lava. What’s more, nobody has even ever explored this area, as the place looks so natural and fine.

DAY 70

I think I’m beginning to panic now. The lava pool has risen a few feet, and without a doubt, will continue until it fills up this entire crater. I’m slowly and carefully trying to climb out, securing a hold and keeping to it for a while while I caught my breath. It’s not very easy when you can’t use your legs and are carrying a bunch of food bundles with you. If I can’t save myself, then I’ll at leat wing my journal clear of the crater. Hopefully someone will find it. And whoever does, tell Alex 43 that he needs a new helmet plume, Gia needs a bath, and Dex needs a haircut. I don’t care what their reaction is, because I’ll most likely be dead when they receive it, so they won’t be able to do anything to me. If I don’t die, though, I’ll remember to cross this section out.

More rabbit. That’s all I bought. Seemed like a good idea at the time, as it was all so tasty. A word to the wise – it’s not.

For some reason, though, I can’t shake the feeling I’m not alone down here.

DAY 72

Almost fell in. Twice. Lost the majority of my food and all my tools in the process. At least it’s easier now that I only have about 2 days worth of food left.

I’m gonna make this entry short and sweet. I think I saw something hovering over the lava. Probably just some smoke patterns blowing in the wind, but it looked so definite. I called to it, but it didn’t respond. However, it’s the least of my worries at the moment, so I simply ignored it.

A drunk dwarf appeared and handed over a kebab. He then realized he had no foothold and fell into the rising lava pool and sank. I laughed to myself, knowing that he’ll be back soon. At least I had a tasty kebab for dinner and saved myself some rabbit.

DAY 75

Contact! It’s not a wisp of smoke after all. It came closer, and I saw there was actually a definite shape floating through the steam. I called to it through shouting, requesting, negotiating, and even threatening, but it took absolutely no notice to me. It looks like some kind of ghost or something, but it more … ‘together’. I kind of wish I brought my ghost-speak amulet. Better yet, I wish I brought my “MOST-speak” amulet- oh wait, here it is. I had it in my pocket the whole time. Silly me. I could’ve used it against the wolves …

Resting at a 60 degree angle now, inches from the lava. My method is to dig away as much of the sand as possible until I hit solid surface, or at least diminish the angle enough for me to climb. So far, it’s only been the later, although I am getting rather nervous of the inevitable collapsing of the more solid ground above me. This crater wasn’t formed naturally, that’s for sure.

Ate the last of my food, and am now ready to fast. I’m not too worried, for once I get back up there, I’ll be able to hunt again. Only this time, I will PROMISE myself that I will watch my footing from now on.

DAY 77

Getting incredibly desperate. Am now at the 75 degree angle, and digging away. The ground above me collapsed quite a bit, but I managed to avoid it. The lava pool is now nearly half-full, taking up the majority of the crater. Unfortunately, there’s just too much sand.

I’ll make this entry a quick one, as I really need to return to digging. The lava’s rising much faster now, which is a very good incentive for putting in extra effort. They really should do that at schools, where they raise the lava in classrooms and only drain it for each correct answer and assignment. I would imagine that would really stem productivity and devotion in students.

The creature is still floating around, taking no notice of me, although sometimes I look towards it and it’s almost as though it’s laughing at something.

DAY 79

I finally made actual contact with the creature. I mumbled to myself about some of my food creations to help desensitize myself to my aching muscles and the creature finally approached me. Despite my current situation of being only a few feet from the lava and clinging onto an 80 degree wall, I managed to get an interview with the help of my trusty amulet. Apparently, it calls itself a “Soul Elemental”. How odd. What’s even odder is that it looks like it had gotten in a fight with a half-dozen drunk witches. Sort of looks like me. … in fact, it actually DOES look like me. Am I a soul elemental too?!?

I’ve enclosed the interview to a letter along with these entries, and have given it to Postie Pete, who by another pure coincidence, just so happened to appear in front of me before losing his letter bag to the lava. Maybe it’s that he only appears when you have a letter or something. Anyways, I’ll just finish this up, and let you guys know that if I ever do get out of this crater, I am far from ending my journey to investigate the unexplored. I only apologize that I couldn’t send a letter earlier, because I was stuck in the tar caves the whole time.

See you guys soon … I hope …

INTERVIEW WITH THE SOUL ELEMENTAL

Please note that the Soul Elemental spoke incredibly slowly (overextended vowels a lot), and in whispers. Lots of the words should have been hyphenated and extended, but I felt it would’ve been unnecessary, so I omitted it. It’s not much of a people-person.

Manya: What exactly ARE you?

Soul: Soul …

Manya: Soul … is that your name?

Soul: Soul … is what I am …

Manya: All right then, Soul. You’re like the actual elemental from soul runes, like there are other elements?

Soul: All elements … need entities … to maintain their order.

Manya: Order?

Soul: Elements … unstable alone … stable with entities …

Manya: I don’t quite understand.

Soul: Mortals … not to know …

Manya: Ok, that’s fine. What exactly do you do as a Soul Elemental?

Soul: Assist … Death … in the under-world … by the over-world … death likes his souls … cleaned … before receiving …

Manya: How do you ‘clean’ souls? This isn’t done with a mop and bucket, is it?

Soul: Special method … secret …

Manya: Just a hint?

Soul: … all I’ll say … is that it involves … fish-bones …

Manya: Fish-bones? Bones from fish? Fish HAVE bones? Bones have FISH?

Soul: Don’t think … they cease to exist … after consumption …

Manya: Hm. I always wondered. Next question: How old are you?

Soul: Time … irrelevant … to elementals …

Manya: Just an average, then?

Soul: Ummm … millennia …

Manya: I got another question. Why do you look like me?

Soul: I am Soul … I appear to all … as themselves …

Manya: Oh, I see. So if, say, the chaos elemental looked at you, you would appear as another chaos ele-

At this point, it proceeded to shoot right up to me, glaring menacingly.

Soul: Evilness … apocalypse … chaos is not but destruction … dare not speak of it …

Manya: It’s not really that evil. In fact, he’s quite nice company, so long as you figure out how to portray yourself as an ally to it. It’s not that easy, but Dex has an interesting way with it.

Soul: Chaos … untamed … do not stray with confidence …

Manya: Don’t worry. It’s not like it lives with us or anything. … mostly …

Soul: Untrusted …

It settled down. I slid a bit from the sudden aggression towards the lava and took some time to pull myself up again.

Manya: So … what’s the death elemental like?

Soul: Too … bossy …

Manya: … that’s it?

Soul: That is all … I will say … about it …
Manya: Do you ever fight stuff?

Soul: No need … no weapon can pierce Soul … no armor can save them … from becoming … consumed …

Manya: Uh, you’re not going to eat my soul, are you?

Soul: I just ate … tasty rabbit … ginseng and peppercorn makes … good soul stew …

Manya: You should try adding just a hint of ground bitterroot and some ranarr flakes. It brings out the flavor of the fat.

Soul: Didn’t know … ranarr went with meat …

Manya: It’s actually quite difficult. You have to prepare the ranarr by simmering it in boiling water, but without letting it actually touch the liquid. Then, it needs to be dried. Vaccuum-dried, preferably. Takes a while, but is well worth it.

Soul: Will try … later …

Manya: I heard that elementals actually ‘live’ in their corresponding altars. Is that true?

Soul: Yes … and no …

Manya: How so?

Soul: Rest … in altar … but not sleep … or live …
Manya: I guess that’s understandable. Man, I kind of wish Postie Pete would make an appearance. I could send this all as a letter to-

Suddenly, by pure coincidence, Postie Pete made an appearance. He slid down the side of the wall, leapt out of his mail-bag, and watched bitterly as it sank into the flames.

Pete: Letter for the SWC?

Soul: The … esss double uuu …

Manya: I’m part of an organization called the SWC … the Saradomin Warrior’s Clan. We keep changing our name. Our leader is Alex 43, the forty-third Alex of Gielinor. Basically a spirit encased in adamantite armor.

Soul: Friends … good …

Manya: You should pop by and say ‘hi’.

Soul: Perhaps … I shall … pay a visit …

Manya: Yeah, you should. I’ll send notice to them letting them know you’re coming.

I finished the letter and gave it to Pete, who teleported away.

Soul: Thank you … spirits … taste lovely … especially the holy ones … savored for eternity …

It had then vanished into the steam.

Manya: … whoops …

Dex Delivers – Guide To The Holidays

posted by on 31st December 2007, at 3:23pm | No Comments
A WORD FROM THE SWC MANAGEMENT (We would like to apologize in advance for what you are about to read. If anything sounds wrong or conflicts with your own personal beliefs, the main rule of thumb is to NEVER TAKE DEX SERIOUSLY. He enjoys doing this for the amusement that there will be someone who […]

Manya’s Mayhem – Trying Something New (PART 1)

posted by on 30th November 2007, at 10:04pm | No Comments
MANYA’S MAYHEM TRYING SOMETHING NEW (Good day to you. This is Alex 43. Since the start of this month, Manya had been missing, along with our boat, so we were stranded for a few days until Dex removed the ocean and we walked to dry land. Just recently, I had received a tar-covered letter from […]
Well, Manya’s taking a day off (more like a month) his Manya’s Mayhem and Alex has gone to University, so I’m left to save his hide and position as an Informer Writer by writing about something that one would think I know nothing about. Girls! You may think that as a master of Majiya, I […]

Manya’s Mayhem – Is there even a purpose to fate?

posted by on 31st August 2007, at 10:54pm | No Comments
Manya’s Mayhem – Is there even a purpose to fate? KING BLACK DRAGON GOES MENTAL A word of caution to the many adventurers and clans out there – go fight the King Black Dragon, will you please? After being overwhelmed by boredom and starvation from a shortage of adventurers, the King Black had gone mental […]

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