SPOILER ALERT!

What spoiler alert you ask? Well the RSSFDTTE got on me last time about giving TOO much information about the quest, they said that someone could have done the quest from my article. Now I didn’t think that I gave THAT much detail about the quest, but to satisfy them (Because you really don’t want to get them angry) I agreed to putting in a SPOILER ALERT, so here it is.

SPOILER ALERT: This article contains information which may show you how to do the quest ‘Land of The Goblins’. If you do not want to know the easiest, most direct, round-about, curvy, straight way to do this quest then you should press ALT + F4. Thank you.

Ok…Now that that’s over let’s get on with the article.

Land of the Goblins brings you back to the Goblin city of Dorgesh-Kaan. Grubfoot, that little goblin that Wartface and Bentnose the Goblin Generals had try on the goblin armor, wants to talk to Zanik. There’s only one problem though, the Cave goblins won’t let any above ground goblins into Dorgesh-Kaan (Okay, just take a message to Zanik for me would ya?). When you talk to Mistag in the mines you agree to vouch for Grubfoot and so he lets Grubfoot in, under your supervision.

Grubfoot wants to tell Zanik something important, so he wants you to bring him to her immediately. When you find Zanik Grubfoot tells her, Oldak, and you about his dream of Yu’biusk, the Land of the Goblins. Zanik, seeing as Yu’biusk is peaceful wants to beable to get there too beable to bring other goblins there so that they can live in peace. There’s only one problem: how do you get to Yu’biusk? Grubfoot says that the High Priest in the Goblin Temple might know the location of it.

Oldak offers to teleport you there, once you’re ready you find yourself in the goblin caves near the Fishing Guild. Once you find a cave entrance guarded by two goblins, you’ve found the spot. Only one more problem, humans aren’t allowed in. Any type of goblin is, but no humans. Zanik will then go into the temple, before you leave it would save time if you were to pick some of the black mushrooms nearby.(I thought those things only grew in the desert?)

Well, now you’re stumped, or are you? When you return to Oldak, he tells you of an ‘It’ he’s talked to above ground.(I bet everyone has talked with this ‘It’ before) Oldak seems to think that the Makeover Mage can turn you into a goblin, so he sends you to him or her or it. Once there, you ask about turning into a goblin to which he/she/it asks why you want to be a goblin, after a talk with him/her/it ‘It’ tells you how to make a Transmoglofication potion with special berries. (which they happen to give you)

Once you’ve made the potion head back to the temple, upon arriving there you must remove everything a that goblin wouldn’t wear (yes that includes your weapon) otherwise the potion won’t work. Once you drink the potion and choose your kind of goblin, you get to pick your name when you talk to the guards. It doesn’t matter which name you pick, just pick one you like, once you have a name you’re allowed in.

Once in you must speak to the High Priest who sits in the rear of the temple, past the altar and preacher. The when you ask about Zanik you find out that she didn’t pass the test and was taken as a prisoner by the black tribe. Once you’ve taken the test you can ask about Yu’biusk, he says he doesn’t know but Snothead, the old High priest, might and he’ll ask him next time he sees him. Snothead is dead, this perplexes you, how can the High Priest speak to him if he’s dead? It turns out that the old High Priest (actually anyone, hehe) can speak to the old High Priests by going into the grave room, the only person allowed in there is the High Priest.

The High Priest tells you that the only way into the grave-room is to unlock its six key lock. The keys, however, are not held by him, instead they’re held by the six priests of the six tribes that live within the temple. To get the keys you must pickpocket the Priests, only problem is that you must get past the guard. To do this you must be wearing their color of armour. When you enter the black tribe’s room you’ll see Zanik in a cage, if you search a nearby crate you’ll find a moving-over-distance sphere, when you gives this to Zanik she teleports away and leaves you to do the rest. (Like usual)

Once you have all six keys you can enter the graveroom. (Which is right behind the High Priest yet he doesn’t notice you going in) Once inside you’ll find five crypts, go to the southwestern crypts and shout ‘Snothead’. His skeleton will appear and you’ll have to fight it, afterwards you’ll beable to talk to him, when you do ask for the name of his predecessor, keep doing this until you find strong bones, then ask about Yu’biusk.

Strongbones says that it isn’t on this realm, that means that goblins aren’t even from this world! Go back to Oldak and you’ll find Zanik with him, tell them about what you found and out and Oldak will think that he can reach the plane of Yu’biusk by using ‘those strange mushrooms’ in the dungeon to the south. Oldak says he and Zanik will meet you there. So go to the agility course dungeon and find Oldak, Zanik and his machine.

Once there Oldak tells you how to operate the Machine and that you must distribute the power while he runs the Machine. Once you get it right you, Zanik and Oldak will be teleported to…

…Yu’biusk? (Uhh Oldak I think you got it wrong!) Nope, he didn’t. This is Yu’biusk, its now a barren wasteland. When you and Zanik explore you find a big chest, about the only thing useable that’s still here. Zanik asks you to help her open it but when you do something inside the box grabs her! You want to investigate it but Oldak says there isn’t enough time because the portal is closing. When you return to Oldak in his workshop you are sad that you weren’t able to save Zanik and the quest ends.

The reward is quite nice, 3,000 experience in Agility, Fishing, Herblore, Thieving, and Strength as well as 2,000 in Prayer along with ability to buy Plain of Mud teleport spheres, make goblin transformation potions, and access to the altar in the Goblin Temple.

Conclusion: Grubfoot had a dream about the Peaceful land of the Goblins named Yu’biusk. You and Zanik try to find this land but Zanik is kidnapped while doing so. You rescue Zanik while finding out that Yu’biusk is not a land in this realm. Zanik is taken away awhile you investigate a strange box in the desolated Yu’biusk.

All in all, its a good quest, though I didn’t like that they made Zanik disappear. The reward is worth it and the storyline was pretty good.

Hmm, I believe that’s all, I hope the RSSFDTTE won’t get on me again, they’re rather heavy…