HAM investigated for ‘diplomatic sabotage.’

posted by on 30th June 2006, at 10:42pm

Humans Against Monsters, or HAM for short, is being investigated for actions which could severely damage relations between the Kingdom of Misthalin and the Dorgeshuun Goblins, King Roald recently announced. It was brought to the king’s attention by renowned adventurer Melanie256 that the Lumbridge based cult had attempted to use a dwarven drilling machine to flood the city of Dorgesh-Kaan with water from the River Lum.

“Such action is simply intolerable,” the king stated, “I won’t have these people attacking a potential ally.”

When asked about the allegations against his group, HAM leader Johanhus Ulsbrecht replied, “That would no doubt be… Sigmunds’s doing. He was always a clever one. Did things his own way. But I would never go so far… as to hurt any friends of humanity.”

Sigmund, former advisor to Duke Horacio of Lumbridge, is known for attempting to convince the Duke to attack the Dorgeshuun shortly after contact with the race was established.

“I don’t doubt the claims one bit,” the Duke replied, “If Sigmund would lie and steal to send Lumbridge to war, there is no telling what else he might do. Already I have sent men searching the countryside to arrest him.”

Though the Dorgeshuun Council were unavailable for comment, a cave goblin adventurer by the name of Zanik did back the accusations against HAM, and even led reporters to the remains of the machine.

Due to the alleged dwarven involvement in this affair, Commander Veldaban of the Keldagrim Black Guard was asked for comment as well.

“Business records do show that an organization calling itself HAM bought a sedimentary mining auger from the Brown Engine Company. The companies of the Consortium do not ask their clients what they intend to do with surplus machinery, but if it is true that this group had intended to use this device for such a malicious purpose, then perhaps it is time we amended our business laws.”

Though he did not comment, the director of the Brown Engine did issue official apologies to Lumbridge and Dorgesh-Kaan, and offered to supply blacksmiths in both towns with coal at twenty percent off the regular price.

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